A holiday message to WJFK 1300

With apologies to Dr. Seuss...

Dear Anita Marks,

The three words that best your show are as follows and I quote, stink, stank, STUNK!

JFK, if you want a woman sports talk host, call Amber Theoharis, a real LOCAL sports chick.

Happy birthday Simon

A birthday tribute to the quotable Simon LeBon...

"It's a recipe for disaster to take yourself seriously!"

"I've got that animal instinct you rely on when you're too stupid to think things out, which I have always been!"

"I decided when I was young that I wanted lots of attention. Being a show-off got me involved in drama and the pop group business and that then got me nice girlfriends. So, I thought, I'll stick at it!"

"Why rock stars marry models? Because they can!"

"I'm not a snob. Ask anybody... well, anybody who matters!"

"It's a very thin line between charisma and bullshit!"

"Never go on stage with a velcro fly. It's not worth the anxiety!"

"Would anybody in the audience like to describe what the song 'The Reflex' is about, because I haven't got a clue!"

“Stand up for yourself, cause you’ve got a right to live as good as anybody else does. Do it for yourself, cause there ain’t nobody else gonna do it for you.”

“Okay, you’re alive. You’ve got a brain. You work it out for yourself. If you don’t like it, maybe you can change it.”

Adios Andy

1979 - 1986, 2001 - 2006

River Valley Ranch

10/14/06

 

 

 

 

Evan & Aunt Alison's Day Of Fun!

Yankees LOSE... ttttttthhhhhhheeeee Yankees LOSE!!!!!

Confessions of a concert goer

I went to see Madonna's Confession Tour in Philadelphia on July 13, the first time I'd seen her live in 21 years. I decided to go very last minute, so I got my ticket just after midnight on the day of the show. Sec. 217, Row 9. In other words, almost on the roof and behind the stage. A "cheap seat" at $55. When I got to the arena, the seat was not as bad as I thought and there was a video screen, so I wouldn't miss much. I did have a great view of the top of Madonna's head! 15 minutes after I sat down, an arena guy came up to me and asked if I was by myself.

"Yes." I replied.

"May I see your ticket, please?"

Now I'm thinking to myself, there is no way someone is going to fight me for this seat! This is odd. He looks at my ticket and asks, "Would you like a floor seat?"

"Yeah!"

"Here ya go, you're in Sec. 3. Enjoy the show!"

I ended up about 10 feet from the catwalk part of stage, the $350 seats! Right where Madonna makes her entrance from a giant disco ball. As if that wasn't cool enough, 10 minutes before show time, Lenny Kravitz walked in and sat about 20 ft from me! The show was fantastic. More a Broadway style show than a rock concert. It was amazing to see Madonna that close. She is much smaller in person. When they say the camera adds 10 lbs, they aren't kidding! The Material Girl is about 5'4", a size 2, if that, and all muscle. It turned out to be the best last-minute decision I ever made!

At last! He returns!

I always find it interesting to see professional athletes performing out of their element. That's one of the reasons I enjoy Pam Shriver's Tennis Challenge so much. Okay, so Brady has a lot to do with that. So, in that spirit, I attended the Baltimore Celebrity Golf Classic on Sunday. My main reason for going was Mickey Tettleton. He's a regular on the Celebrity Golf Tour and I promised myself that if it ever came to town, I would go see him. Since it was only a few miles away, I had no excuse not to go. Besides, it's a charity event and I can spare a ten'er for that.

Golf is SO BORING! I went on Sunday, because I figured with the Ravens' season starting, the golf thing would be less crowded. Well, I was right. I am pretty sure I was one of the dozen people who actually paid to get into this event. It was pathetic! I expected at least a few hundred! Mickey didn't tee off until 2 hours after I got there, which was good for him because it meant he was in second place, but left me ready to leave 1/2 hr after I got there!

I followed him for the first 2 holes. He was partnered with Dave Johnson, who pitched for the O's when Mickey played here. It was me and 2 young guys following Mickey's group. After they teed off at #3, I went back to the clubhouse to sit down in the grand stand and wait for them to come around to holes #9 & 10. An 1 hr and 15 minutes later, they finally came back. After he teed off at #10, I couldn't take it anymore and I left. He was in first place, and I never got to talk to him or get an autograph, but I just had to get out of there!! I'd been there for 4 1/2 hrs and he was only halfway through the course! I really just wanted to see him again to get some closure, since he had retired just before the Rangers were coming to town back in '97. That mission was accomplished.

I got on the parking shuttle and the young guys who had been following Mickey and Dave got on with me. Turns out, one of the guys was Dave Johnson's son. Even those guys weren't fans!

Quotable Coupling

Jane:

--"Friendship’s more lasting than love, and more legal than stalking."

-- "Vegetarianism for me is about saying ‘yes’ to things - even meat."

-- "Steve, I've gone to a dinner party and I'm accidently naked!"

-- "To think, when I was committing suicide, I'd very nearly given up hope!"

-- (after revealing she's being stalked) " And it's never the same man twice. Sometimes they switch over when I'm halfway home. It's SO well-organized."

-- "Well, Andrew, there is something I had better explain. God is just a made-up person. You can't expect him to be answering your prayers when he's not real, can you? That's like writing to the characters of a soap opera and expecting a reply, Mr. Silly Sausage."

-- "We're your friends. We want to know what's wrong with your handsome boyfriend."

Patrick:

--"I’m thirty-three, single, with neat hair. Even I think I’m gay. "

Steve:

--"It’s not genetically possible for men to have opinions about fabric."

-- "There are three things all men should know, and it’s time you did too. You’re never going to be famous, you’re fatter than you think, and most important of all, they don’t keep wearing stockings."

-- "Your DNA must cry itself to sleep at night."

-- "When man invented fire, he didn't say, 'hey, let's cook', he said, 'great, now we can see naked bottoms in the dark.'"

-- "Lap dancing is the ultimate nightmare of man. Porn that can see you."

-- "What in the name of God's arse is pot pourri? Looks like breakfast. Smells like your auntie."

-- "Thank you, Jeff, that's quite enough. He's not here, is he? Oh dear God, I've internalized him."

Susan:

-- "We’re talking about men. They regard nose-picking as the bright side of flu."

--"I'm angry. Making sense gets in the way."

-- "Things men are capable of interpretating as offers of sex: 'Hello.' 'Oh look it's raining.' 'My boyfriend's just been kidnapped by drug smugglers.' 'Get out. '"


Sally:

-- "As Susan's best friend I am to you a bit like Australia: very distant, largely uninhabitable and with areas of great danger."

-- "A woman's breasts are a journey. Her feet are the destination."

-- "It's a relationship. We have to discuss things now, Patrick. There is a time for just taking off and enjoying yourself and that time is over. Now we have to have huge, enormous discussions first, with crying."

Jeff:

-- "To know about the giggle loop, is to become part of the giggle loop."

--"I'm always this nervous, you're just closer, you can see better"

-- "When God made the arse, he didn't say, 'Hey, it's just your basic hinge, let's knock off early.' He said, 'Behold ye angels, I have created the arse. Throughout the ages to come, men and women shall grab hold of these, and shout my name.' "

-- "No self-respecting woman would ever let a naked man in socks do the squelchy with her."

-- " Yea, still, you know what it's like. You phone someone, someone you know, or a woman, and you don't know what's going on. You're just suddenly in the middle of someone's house; anything could be happening! There could be old people, naked."

Take Back The Birds
September 21, 2006


Madonna Lyric of the Day: "I'm fed up. I'm tired of waiting on you." -- Hung Up

August 10, 2006

Happy National Duran Duran Appreciation Day!

A little common courtesy

If a store is closing for the day, quickly finish your shopping and be on your merry way. DO NOT hang around for the next half hour! After closing is not your personal shopping time. People who work in retail have lives too. They are not your servants. Next time you are in a store that is about to close, just think how you would feel if someone dropped a pile of work on your desk at 4:50pm and you couldn't leave until it was finished.